Mic Check...1, 2, 3

There are some things that I keep in my “back pocket” so to speak, and singing is one of them.

It’s not normally something I tell people I can do. For one, suddenly they want you to "sing them something." Ugh, no thank you! 

Now, I don’t claim to be some amazing singer, but I have enough confidence to say that yes, God has given me some talent in that department. If there are two things that run through my veins, it’s music and teaching.

Both sides of my family are eatin’ up with musical talent and gifts of teaching. I don’t just mean my immediate family, I mean great, great, great grandparents. Those seem to be the two generational things that have trickled down. Well, lets make it three. The other is Ministry. The only reason I know this is because my papa (on my dad’s side) loves genealogy and made a book of our families history for my dad and aunts and uncles and gave it to them for Christmas one year. It’s so fascinating to read and see what kind of men and woman I come from, and those three things have followed my family through the years. Love of Jesus, Passion for Music, Gift of Teaching!

So anyway I guess thats why it doesn’t surprise me, now, that from the womb I loved music. Now, getting me up in front of people…that was a different story. The first time I tried to perform in front of a crowd I ran off the stage crying! Singing around the house with whatever I could find to substitute for a mic…that was a different story.

I’m not sharing all this to just talk about myself…haha. I really am going to make a point.

As much as I’ve always loved music and loved singing it’s also been the one thing that provokes fear and insecurity in me.  

After I became a Christian, Jesus did what only Jesus could do…he healed me of stage fright. I’m not joking. Now, I still get alittle nervous when I know I have to be in front of people. Unless it’s to teach the Bible or talk about Jesus I’d much rather not be up in front of people. But the fear to the point of tears, that was GONE!

Over the years though singing was always something I would put my toe in but to jump in was terrifying!! I loved music. Always have. I even loved singing, but never felt good enough to do sing any kind of solo. 

I did choir throughout middle and high school at church, I was in chorus in Elementary school, but it wasn’t until around 2009 that I took the leap to go try out for my church's (at the time) worship band. Ugh, last thing I wanted to do.

"Lord, wouldn’t you rather I led a small group of taught a Bible study? I can do that! But sing?!?"

With some nudging from our College Pastor’s wife I did it. At the time they didn’t have any open positions, but they did need someone to lead up in The Attic. The Attic was what we called our Children’s Ministry worship experience. On Sunday mornings the kids would have a worship experience just like the adults did in "big church." It was the first time I led by myself…it helped they were little and didn’t care if I was on key or not. But the more I did it the more comfortable I became. But it was something that still made me super nervous yet at the same time was something I loved.

Flash forward three years later I get a text from my cousin Matt. He’s one of the worship leaders at a church here in Atlanta, and he asked me if I wanted to sing  backup for him. He and I had gotten to talking about music awhile back when our family had gotten together for our great grandmothers funeral. During dinner afterward Matt and I got to talking and got on the topic of music (which he obviously remembered) and asked if I wanted to sing with him.

The question came during a very rough week for me emotionally. Just really wrestling with God over some things, and direction was one of them.

Then low and behold the Lord flung a door open I would have rather kept shut. I was glad he opened it, don't get me wrong. But in my insecurity I knew it was something I didn’t have a tone of experience in (some yes, but not a lot) and in my mind I wasn’t going to be “perfect” at it.”

I’m so grateful for my cousin and his patience, because he sat down with me to practice one afternoon (just he and I) and it took me some time to finally warm up were I even felt comfortable enough to belt out a note (I knew I could and he knew I could) but my insecurities and fear kept me from doing it.

I looked at Matt and just said, “I’m nervous.” His response with a chuckle, “don’t be nervous. It’s just me, your cousin.”  It wasn’t because of him, I was nervous to not sound perfect. For him to decided to take back is request of wanting me to sing with him. He’s probably thinking, I would reason, “why did I ask her?!”

Matt’s an honest guy, so I knew if he didn’t want me…he’d just say so. After practice, he only had nice things to say (to my surprise) and still wanted me at the band practice (again, to my surprise).

Just this past Friday night myself and 4 guys met at the church for band rehearsal. Of course I went to the bathroom for a quick second before hand (aka. Prayer closet) and lifted up that night to Jesus. I knew it was only by His Spirit that anything was going to come out of my mouth!!!

The night went really great!!!!

I don’t know if you’re like me, but you’re your biggest critic?

I share all of that to say something simple that I am having to learn myself (not just in this particular area but in many areas) we can’t expect perfection right out the gate. It takes practice!! Even with teaching it’s something that the more you do it the more natural it can become. Doesn’t mean you still don’t depend on the Lord for the strength and anointing to do it. 

It’s like in anything that God has called you or I to do…we can’t do it without Him. Whatever it is that God has called you or I to do we simply cannot do. No matter how much experience or education we have we can only do what God has called us to do with God!

Be okay with not being the best right out, strive for excellence, but don’t compare yourself to anyone else. Your best will look different than someone else’s best.

Whatever it is God has called you to do you cannot do apart from His Spirit empowering you to do it. Embrace your limitation and rest in the Lord's abilities. He who called you is faithful, HE WILL DO IT