Marriage Myths
Last night at Pillars we finished up the Louie Giglio study Boy Meets Girl and I thought I would share with you some of what we studied. Out of all the sessions this one along with the 5th and the 2nd one are probably my favorites. I remember when my dad gave me the CD's as a Christmas present when I was about 19 years old, and they forever changed how I approached relationships. It was around that same time that I made the commitment not to get into a serious relationship until I knew it was the man I was going to marry. Anyway, no matter how many times I have heard this series I always learn something new. But, I hope this will also encourage you, and help you resist the LIE the culture tries to feed you when it comes to relationships/marriage. I added my own ten cents at the end. My desire for my future marriage. Let God place a dream in your heart!
Marriage Myth
God, in the beginning, set into motion, the best plan, the best-case scenario for your relationship and for your marriage.
God cares today about your future
Eph 5:22-23
What this passage means is: wives are supposed to submit to their husbands(not boyfriends). Wives to your husbands like you would the Lord. That just put a whole more pressure on the guy right then than it did the girl. The man, needs to be someone like the Lord that she can submit to. Does't mean he does it perfectly,but he is trying.
FIND A GUY THAT IS LOVING HIS WIFE LIKE CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH AND YOU WILL FIND A WIFE THAT DOESN’T MIND SUBMITTING AT ALL
It’s not about who comes first and lording over the other person, it’s about realizing we both, man AND woman, need outside help. There is order in the economy of God. It has nothing to do with value...it has to do with order and a picture. Men and woman are equally as valuable to God, but their is an order...the is a picture God is painting.
MARRIAGE ON EARTH IS NOT SIMPLY ABOUT YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE. MARRIAGE ON EARTH IS A MIRROR THAT WE HOLD UP TO THE WHOLE WORLD TO SAY THIS IS WHO OUR GOD IS AND THIS IS WHO HE IS LIKE! THAT’S WHY GOD IS FULL ON INTO THIS THING CALLED MARRIAGE AND WHY THE ENEMY IS FULL ON AGAINST IT IN AN ONSLAUGHT OF EVERY POWER AND EVERY FORCE THAT HELL HAS, BECAUSE IT’S A MIRROR TO THE CULTURE, TO THE WORLD, OF WHAT CHRIST IS TO THE REDEEMED OF GOD
Jesus Christ is saying ‘Yes, I want to be the Lord of your life. I demand to be Lord of your life. I’m the Lord of the whole universe so why wouldn’t I be Lord of your life. But in asking you to be Lord of your life and demanding to be Lord of your life, I’m telling you I’ve given my life for your life and I’ve given myself for you
SEVEN MYTHS ABOUT MARRIAGE
1) All you need is love
The truth is= All you need is HIS love
The cross was Christ’s ‘I LOVE YOU” to YOU!
2) Marriage will solve all your problems
The truth is= Marriage does NOT solve your problems, but marriage magnifies your problems.
If you have problems now (self-esteem, anger, selfishness, etc) marriage is NOT going to take that away and cure those issues, it’s going to magnify and make them bigger.
Start thinking TODAY about what you don’t want to be under the magnified glass when you say “I DO.” Start asking God NOW to prepare you for TODAY.
You marriage does not start when he/she walks through you the door. Your marriage starts now. Start thinking like a dot connecter. Today touches tomorrow and will ultimately touch my husband/wife. Your decisions today will effect your future spouse.
On that day (your wedding day), NOTHING is going to change about you! Whatever your struggles are RIGHT NOW, are going to be your struggles when you get married.
“THE MAGNIFYING GLASS OF MARRIAGE IS GOING TO INTENSIFY YOUR PROBLEMS!”
Good News! Whatever godly characteristics God is building into you now, marriage is going to magnify that too!
3) The relationship you are in NOW, does not have anything to do with your future.
It’s called “short-sited dating and short-sited relationships”
The truth is= YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW. WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING RIGHT NOW IN A RELATIONSHIP IS GOING TO BE APART OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP IN THE FUTURE.WHATEVER SEEDS YOU SOW NOW KNOW THAT PLANTS ARE COMING IN THE FUTURE.
4) Marriage confines you.
The truth is= Marriage completes you
Side Note- this is not saying that you need marriage to be complete; what he is saying is that Marriage completes the bigger picture. Marriage is about being a mirror to a watching world, and God set it up were man would need help and God provided a helper and together they would be a reflection of Christ and the Church to a watching world. You don’t need marriage to be complete, but when you are in Christ…marriage completes the bigger picture. If you are not content single you will not content married.
Adam needed a helper. Adam did not come to God and ask for a helper God wanted Adam to have a helper and provided the suitable helper for him. God brought Adam, GET THIS, who he NEEDED!!! We get so caught up in our "dream person" that we don't stop and say God I want the person you know I need. It might not happen the way you always thought, or he/she might not come through the door the way you imagined, or say what you thought they would say....lay down your "ideal" situation and trust that God is going to make it happen, and he will bring you who HE knows you NEED! God brought Adam a "SUITABLE HELPER." Meaning, someone who would help him in the mission he had given him. God was the one that told Adam “you NEED a helper" and then brought her to him.
His “I DO” at the cross opened up a doorway for our relationship with the Father,, which in some way brought glory to God in the whole marriage as a picture of God. It completed God’s plan and in the same way completes us. When Jesus died on the cross it completed the bigger picture.
5) It at first you don’t succeed, try again
It’s called the “Parachute Mentality”- the “way out” mindset. We think we can just separate the homes and dissolve the union God has established, but we can’t.
The truth is= you can separate bodily and physically, but you can’t separate spiritually what God has joined together.
Mark 10:1-12
It's a sabotage in the beginning to have a parachute mentality
“If God has done the joining, man can’t do the unjoining”
DIVORCE IS A MYTH…but Christ can REDEEM IT!
6) Marriage is mostly about you and him
TRUTH IS= Your marriage is for the glory of God! So that you can stand there on your wedding day and say, WE ARE STANDING HERE, JOINING FORCES, FOR GOD!
Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.- Ps 34:3
One Heart. One Mind. One Purpose. One Goal! United for His fame!
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